Short Story, for practice english

[Grim Assassin]

    A single tear fell like a jewel from the perfect eyes of the Elflord Falitan. With all life held in devout reverence, the murderous scene before him crushed the very breath from his lungs, black stars dancing in his dimming vision, the vile stench of blood like fire in his mind.
    He fell heavily to his knees; the red liquid soaked into his white robes instantly, staining the cloth with Gilean’s sacred colour. The rose marble of his home was icy beneath him, its natural warmth stolen by the terrible act committed within. The lifeless body of his brother, Galdatan, nestled almost childlike upon the bed. His slender neck had been broken with a swift, vicious twist. The golden skin beneath his delicate jaw line was bruised bright purple, his pale hair falling around it like a ghostly shroud.   
    Falitan turned from the sight to see Galdatan’s guards lying dead, crumpled against the wall. They had suffered a brutal death, their flesh broken and bloodied, their mithril swords snapped and tossed away with disdain. Through his tears, Falitan barely noticed the sparkling grey dust still covering their dead eyes…
    A rustle made him spin around, his arms reaching out to hurl magic at whatever evil beast had slaughtered his brethren, but only shadows remained to meet his anger. After a moment, Falitan’s eyes were drawn to a scrap of black cloth pinned to one of the guard’s breastplates. Snatching it up, he examined it with a practiced look. A piece of fine black silk sewn with a golden circle lay in his palm.
    ‘So…’ He whispered, rage dripping from every word, ‘He has joined the Prince.’

[Jemma]

WOW!!

[Elyndor]

one thing i noticed, at first, it seemed almost as if falitan was hurt, whole blood thing on his robes and such, but then he is fine...

otherwise though, its amazing

[aresius]

Nah, doesent seem falitian was hurt because he mentions the robes only beeing covered when he kneels, showing the blood was over the floor. Very nice indeed.

[Solan]

Yep, very nicely done indeed.
Waiting for the next installment

[Paola]

Fabulous!
And reminds me of Gral.
Seems someone still keeps me as a total idiot...